"His treachery knows no bounds; no limits! The logarithmic curve of his morality defies the very fundamental principles of physics and shows not one asymptote. "
These were the very words that, whilst the the throes of passion, spued out of my wife's mouth. You are ignoble my friend, and it is a shame. No woodpecker in the world may save your soul now.
Yours,
Toby
Whether any woodpecker could save Monty's soul may be debatable - perhaps a Royal Kingfisher could. However,it is patently obvious even to the erectile dysfunctional that the problems that these two friends (more than friends?)are experiencing stem from the machinations of the dissolute wife of one of the parties.
ReplyDeleteIt is perhaps a little known fact that the lady in question is insatiable in matters of the groin. This has been proven mathematically. As an exchange student (many moons ago)on the reservation of Tiksa Lami, she had participated in experiments by the renowned Native American mathematician turned sexologist, Archimedes Johnson. Through personal sacrifice he triangularly proved beyond all shadow of a doubt that the "squaw on the hypotenuse (the lady in question) equaled (and sometimes exceeded) the sum of the squaws on the other two sides."
Please note that Archimedes Johnson does not appear under this name in the official Who's Who of the Tiksa Lami nation. Therein he is listed under his native name: Little phallus.
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